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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28709664">Not in every universe but in this.</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/rayjey/pseuds/rayjey'>rayjey</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Supernatural</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Castiel Gets What Castiel Wants (Supernatural), Character Study, Dean Winchester Deserves Nice Things, Dean Winchester Deserves to be Happy, Episode: s15e20 Carry On, Established Castiel/Dean Winchester, Fix-It of Sorts, Fluff, Human Castiel (Supernatural), Human Castiel in the Men of Letters Bunker (Supernatural), M/M, Maybe - Freeform, Multi, This? Just me coping with the spn finale, Wordcount: 100-1.000, coping after the the spn finale</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 09:53:43</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>620</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28709664</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/rayjey/pseuds/rayjey</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Castiel is happy.</p>
<p>Like that's it, and shameless fluff.</p>
<p>Sneak peek:<br/>In every other timeline, in every other universe, Castiel turned around and left.<br/>He did not fall, did not break<br/>He was an angel through and through.<br/>He did as he was told, and left.<br/>He was saved from the pain and the heartbreak for the years to come.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Castiel &amp; Jack Kline, Castiel/Dean Winchester</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>13</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Not in every universe but in this.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>In every other timeline, in every other universe, Castiel turned around and left.<br/>
He did not fall, did not break<br/>
He was an angel through and through.<br/>
He did as he was told, and left.<br/>
He was saved from the pain and the heartbreak for the years to come.</p><p>He remained God's good little soldier.<br/>
With no doubts, always sure he was doing the right thing.<br/>
His faith in heaven never fails.<br/>
Maybe he dies in the battle against Lucifer, maybe he doesn't.<br/>
But in those timelines he's never felt anything, he was happy, at least he thought he was.<br/>
But he wasn't human, he never got to live.<br/>
In the other timelines, he believes in his great course.</p><p>But this Castiel didn't, doesn't.<br/>
He turned his back on heaven on God.<br/>
In this universe he experienced pain in ways he couldn't imagine, he did horrible things.<br/>
But still, he was happy.<br/>
He had a life, a family, love.</p><p>From the first moment when Castiel had seen Dean's soul in hell.<br/>
So bright and full of colours in the dark pits of hell.<br/>
Still so bright and alive.<br/>
When he had rescued Dean from hell, rebuilt his body.<br/>
He was gone, he didn't realize it.<br/>
But that was the moment he began to fall.<br/>
It was only months later when his grace disappeared, that he fell.<br/>
But he had fallen long before that.</p><p>He got his grace back.<br/>
But he wanted to be human again, to feel like he did before.</p><p>So here he was a human, and it was hard.<br/>

It was the little things in his day.<br/>
The fact that his body hurt, in the morning.<br/>
That he got headaches, and stomach aches.<br/>
He was getting old, and sweaty.<br/>
It was all so hard, especially exercise, he really didn't like exercise.</p><p> </p><p>This was the life he had chosen, a life he wanted.<br/>
The way Jack smiled, so happy about the world.</p><p> </p><p>The sun in Dean's hair, that made it glow.<br/>
Jacks smile.<br/>
When Dean was enthusiastic about something, the way he would talk and talk.<br/>
When Dean kissed him.<br/>
His hands in his hair.<br/>
The way Dean's soul was so bright even after all the hell he went through.</p><p>Castiel loved a lot of things but most of all he loved Dean and humanity.<br/>
He had grown strong over the years, he was his own person now.</p><p>All the other timelines he left.<br/>
He didn't get to grow, he was just Castiel angel of Thursday, another angel in the flock.<br/>
But this Castiel had Dean, Jack, Sam, he was Cas.<br/>
He had people who loved him, and most importantly he loved himself.<br/>
He turned human once more because he wanted to.</p><p>In the morning he would wake in a just a little too cold room.<br/>
In an underground bunker.<br/>
He could stare down on his naked chest, where a sleeping Dean Winchester would be drooling all over his chest.<br/>
Which was nasty, but he didn't care.<br/>
Dean would look peaceful, in his sleep.<br/>
Peaceful and happy.<br/>
He smiled and dried the droll of his chest with the blue pillowcase.<br/>
"Morning Cas"<br/>
Dean would say, opening his eyes.<br/>
Castiel would smile at him.<br/>
"I would appreciate it if you didn't droll all over me"<br/>
Dean just rolled his eyes at him.<br/>
"why I love you I have no idea"<br/>
Dean would say and nuzzle closer into his chest.<br/>
"Love you too, Dean"</p><p>Castiel the angel of Thursday angel would cuddle with the legendary monster hunter Dean Winchester.<br/>
He would sleep and be happy.<br/>
It didn't happen anywhere else only here.<br/>
Castiel was okay with that.<br/>
He was okay with being alive and dying, being human.<br/>
Because he was happy.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hope you enjoy it.<br/>Kudos and comments are appreciated.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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